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The first fourteen years of my kids’ lives were pretty easy – not in the sense that we faced no challenges because there were plenty. Rather, I felt in control of my children’s lives on most days. Sure, there was the occasional temper tantrum, dirty room, or smart mouth, through the years. But I don’t know if anything could have adequately prepared me for the journey I would take through those teen years. What happened to my sweet, obedient little angels? It seemed that almost overnight, my son developed a mind of his own – complete with his own ideas and thoughts about life. (Yes, I know that’s what is supposed to happen, but annoying nonetheless!)  One afternoon, I received a call from my son’s school that he had gotten in trouble for cheating on a test. It was devastating. I was ma...

Okay, full disclosure here. I struggled with the title of this article. Our children, young or older, are gifts from God. They are precious and called with a purpose. God has a plan for them, filled with purpose and hope. And we love them with every fiber of our being, so let’s just get all that out of the way first. Admitting that our children can be difficult does not mean they aren’t gifted by God or that we don’t love them immensely, it simply means that parenting them is …… well…. Difficult! That said, I wanted struggling mommas to be able to find the words on this page, as they sojourn through what may be some of the hardest days of their lives. I wanted them to know they came to the right place – that this sisterhood of mothers is locking arms with them in spirit and that we are all...

The more hurt I was, the more I wanted to run. The more I replayed the past, the more I wanted to simply stay underneath the covers and not get up in the mornings. It seemed the harder life was, the more I wanted to isolate myself from others. And life got darker….and darker…. and darker.    That’s the danger of isolation. When we’re going through hard times, it is easy for us to isolate ourselves. We don’t want others around. We don’t want to cry one more tear over the situation. We don’t want to explain our emotions again and again. But the more we pull away, the darker the situation becomes. God created us for community. He created us so that others around us can encourage us when we are down. He uses people to speak life into us, when we are too ...

Mommas, I know there are some of you out there – many of you – who are facing an immense amount of discouragement. The weight of it sits squarely on your chest, sometimes making it hard to get out of bed in the morning. Sometimes, this single parenting journey can seem like an impossible task, wrought with difficulty, obstacles, hardships, and criticism. Just when you seem you are getting a little bit ahead, another mountain presents itself for climbing. You run hard, putting out many fires along the way. You are often juggling several balls in the air, and inevitably, drop one – leaving guilt, and too often, discouragement. I know how difficult it can be. I know because I have been there too, more times than I can count. I’ve often felt that I’ve done all I could and it simply wasn’t good...

Moms, I have been where some of you sit. I’ve been through the times of lacking techniques, realizing no one really taught me how to parent. I’ve been having a teenager failing classes, getting in trouble at school, smoking weed, sexual immorality, dishonoring our family, disrespect. I’ve been through wayward children.  I’ve been through it all. The following tips are truly everything I know and everything the Lord has laid on my heart about parenting in difficult times.  Watch what you are saying. What is coming from your mouth matters. It matters in the spirit and natural realm. The things we are saying to our children can often be bred from frustration and exhaustion and disappointment. We’re battling the demand of work and school demands and disobedience in the...

Like many teenagers, I entered my senior year of high school with a list of big plans to be accomplished after graduation, not the least of which was to run as fast as I could from my small town, leaving it in the dust. I would get my degree, land a big-time job in an even bigger city, probably New York, and I would change the world with my loud, very passionate, never wrong, voice. I would live in a Manhattan apartment and wear a business jacket and high heels to work every day, as I stormed hurriedly down a busy street with a briefcase in tow. Somehow, things didn’t quite work out like I planned.   Although I graduated high school as valedictorian of my senior class with scholarships to attend colleges around the country, I was secretly pregnant, contemplating what my next moves wou...

I love this God-given opportunity He has placed in my life. I love being a mom of three very different children, two whom are adults now.  I love being a wife, a friend, and a coworker. I love working with churches, pastors, and anyone who has a heart to serve single mothers and their families. However, there have been too many times to count over the years, that I worked myself into complete exhaustion and burn-out. In that place of exhaustion, I found myself short-tempered, rude, bitter, angry and unwilling to share why.   Whether we answer to wife, mom, student, employee, pastor, or a hundred other roles, the common theme among us is wondering if we are making a difference in our world and how can we keep pushing through?  I am convinced this is most true of women. T...

Look up, my darling, look up. When I hear Him, this space I’m in, at this plain wooden table, this window with the cobwebs at the corner of the metal screen, this soft rumble of washing machine, this smell of wet dog near my feet, I study the room, looking for clues for what is different. All is different? No, all is the same. But in that place deep within me, what is different is that I am still. Not nervous or fearful. Not anxious or tired. My body, held in this temporal existence of space and time, feels my lungs filling with air, my mind captivated by my heart’s calling: Yes, you are here, and more than here. Where the water laps around me, my body floating, drifting with the rolls of the waves. Immersed in beauty, yes. Immersed in Me. When night falls, the ground wet with rain, I jump...

The holiday season is a time of thanksgiving and gratitude. It is a time to reflect. We gather around fires and giggle with family. We host parties, give gifts, and drink hot cocoa. We visit friends and tell old stories. We roast chestnuts on the open fire. (Has anyone ever actually done that?) We thank God for our blessings and often look for ways to bless others.   Sometimes, that blessing comes in the form of financial giving. It is a vital part of giving back to others. It is important that we understand that God often works through us to bless others. Maybe you think you don’t have much to give. It’s ironic how God uses what we deem to be insignificant to change the lives of others around us. I am sure that the little boy whose mom prepared his lunch of five loav...

Christmas is my favorite holiday of the year. Those who know me will attest to that fact.  I begin my holiday planning in October. I’m singing Christmas carols at the first hint of a fallen leaf! I start thinking about Christmas décor and holiday gatherings mid-year. I make lists of friends and neighbors that I’d like to bake some goodies for. I relish the day it turns cold, so I can bring out a scarf or sweater. (We Southerners don’t get much cold weather here, so we take every advantage of being able to pull out our boots and sweaters when it crests below 60 degrees!) I love hot cocoa and apple cider and the smell of cinnamon and pumpkin pie and apple pie and… well…you get the point!  But I also fully recognize that the holiday season can conjure f...

Have you ever wondered if you are in alignment with God’s instruction? Have you wondered if that little voice in your head was the devil or God? Have you heard something in your spirit man, then second-guessed whether or not it was God? Or maybe you’ve wondered whether or not you were in God’s will?   Some of us have even cried out to God in our journey with questions, like, “Where are you? Do you hear me? Do you even care?”   Today, I want to give you 9 principles of learning to truly hear the voice of God in your life.   Don’t be double minded // James 1:5-8 says “If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking. But when you ask him, be sure that your faith is in God alone. Do not waver, for a pers...

By the time I was 21 years old, I had suffered a lifetime of disappointments. Both of my parents were dead, as well as all my grandparents and most of my aunts and uncles. I had seen more death than most do in a lifetime. I was pregnant multiple times outside of marriage, which carries its own shame and embarrassment. I had been homeless, lived on government assistance, and struggled to put food on the table as a single mom. I had already parented alone for several years and had no way of knowing that I would go on to parent even more years alone. And all of those things shaped me and molded me with fear.   But the journey I embarked upon a few years back was far worse than I could have even imagined. Ten years ago, I decided to walk away from my comfy job in Corporate America an...